Today, I sense Jesus asking me, "Do you trust me?" The Peter-esk answer is, "Lord, you know I trust you." Peter seemed surprised by Jesus' question. You KNOW I love you! My reaction is not one of surprise - more like leeriness or feeling guarded. If pressed, my honest answer often includes caveats and conditions. "Well, [pause] I'll definitely trust you in this circumstance, if you first provide in that way." Or, "I can trust you this hour, but next hour I will probably not." I am resigned to confess, "No, I don't trust you enough."
Trusting with conditions or not trusting fully may be like showering with your clothes on! It doesn't work that way. Or maybe it must and we will, in our human weakness, trust imperfectly all the days of our lives till we have crossed into eternity. I don't know. But I do know that I am being called to trust God with more, and to a greater degree. It feels like I am being stretched like a rubber band. And when rubber bands are stretched without being handled with care, they fling in crazy ways! But I have seen my God handle me with care. God is my provider and this is a truth that has comforted and given courage. Being stretched but faithless will find me brittle or broken. Being stretched while seeking to rest in my God - this is fertile ground for growth. God's goodness does not hinge on my trust.
Take a deep breath! "Oh for grace to trust Him more."
