Great Expectations vs I Shall Not Want

Is there a particular word that you dislike more than others?  A cringe-inducing, grates-on-your-nerves word?  I have one.  If I use it in conversation or speak about it like I know, it's fine.  Even "spiritual."  But if it sneaks into my heart and mind uninvited, look out.  It's the "S" word.

I tend to have high expectations for life.  I resonate with Thoreau - I want "to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life."  (Um....gross!?  But I digress.)  Adventure, fun, exploits, insight- did I mention fun?  I seek after a full life, well-lived.  It takes zeal and courage.  Can you relate to the courage needed when hoping for a new thing, a bigger thing?  The excitement that comes with careful planning towards your passion?  But the new or bigger thing doesn't always happen.  The prayer gets answered with a loud "No!"  Your expectation is not met.  When hopes are dashed again, discouragement can set in.  What then?  

For me, discouragement takes a nasty turn when it is not spoken aloud to a person of trust, wisdom, and compassion.  And for me to speak out loud my discouragement takes courage!  These feel antithetical:  If I am already discouraged, and it takes courage to talk, then the likelihood of me sharing it with another person is not exactly an ace in the hole. But there are Spirit-led times when I do share my feelings and doubts; God brings it to light, where His truth can reveal lies I have believed about my circumstance, or about my God.  But I cannot represent as one who does this well and often.  So many times, I keep discouragement to myself for too long. What then?  A critical spirit can take root.

This cycle of Great Expectations met with Acute Disappointment turns into Critical Spirit dawned on me this week.  A dear friend confessed having a critical spirit; I realized I am guilty of the same.  As I prayed over this, this cycle seemed to come into view.  I can trace back the lines of this in my life:  I think I see God's work on the horizon; I am watchful.  He seems to be on the brink of a new thing.  I pray.  I plan.  Baby, I am on board with the New Thing, yes and amen!  Then the new thing doesn't happen.  Or worse, the work seems to move from high-speed 5th gear, shoved abruptly into reverse.  No, no, no!  In my own power, I cannot handle the disappointment or its best friend, disillusionment.  So these joined forces form a critical spirit.  As in, I am on a fact-finding mission to determine causes and some one or thing is usually to blame (says my disappointed and disillusioned heart), and I am fairly determined to find out.  Trouble is, this usually becomes a vicious cycle. 

How do you break the cycle?  I could request a personality transplant.  I could become chronically complacent with low-expectations.  (Who wants to suck life's marrow anyway?)  How do I handle the disappointment?  Is it a sin to be disappointed?  I don't see evidence of that in the Bible, but I do know how damaging is a critical spirit.  The only way I know to handle this is by using the dreaded "S" word.

Surrender.  Oh, for the Christian to sing about surrendering all to Christ - so sweet, so simple.  SO ridiculously hard when we have hard-fought for something big.  But what else is there to do but surrender?  Being critical usually leads me to anger.  Anger is an interesting motivator and energy source for awhile.  Till its ugly side effects are seen or felt.  Till its obvious that it is incredibly depleting.  (Because the joy of the Lord is my strength, not the anger of my jaded self.)  When I have sought God's will and still experience acute disappointment, a critical spirit sets in unless I can share it with another, and then surrender.  What does that even mean?  I let go of what I wanted so badly.  I imagine opening my tight-fisted hands and dropping the thing (or the hopes of the thing) into God's hands, believing Him to be wise, and loving, and good.
 
This song cuts me to the quick.  Titled, "I Shall Not Want," it names our fears and unmet longings.  With them comes the reminder of the promise of God's goodness as recounted in Psalm 23, "surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life....I shall not want."

What Have You Become?

This is like a Choose Your Own Adventure blog post.  Did you read those growing up?  I binged on them one summer.  My paperback page-turning skills were mad that year.

Read the whole post or just the Truth Section or just the Dare Section.  So fun! 

Truth:  I am sad to see Christ Community's summer sermon series on the Ten Commandments come to an end.  I am still ruminating on the teaching; still surprised by the depth of this "good" book (and for the record, who coined that term?  What an underwhelming term for the inspired word of God!); still needing to look more deeply into this mirror, to face the necessary changes with grace and courage.

Dare:  How to Kill "Church Greeting Time" in 10 Easy Steps:
It's that time in the worship service again.  Check your breath, fix on a smile, and greet someone!  Only today you are instructed to "Confess your sins one to another during today's Greeting Time, and you will be healed.  Model this special confession after the Ten Commandments."

Take a deep breath, turn to your unsuspecting seat neighbor, and begin:

"Hi!  I am Sara.  I...

1.  set myself up as God,
2.  am an idolater, 
3.  abuse of God's name, 
4.  keep an unholy Sabbath Day,
5.  dishonor my mother and father, 
6.  am a murderer,
7.  am an adulterer,
8.  am a stealer, [not to be confused with Steeler - little preseason football humor],
9.  bear false witness against a whole lotta people,
10. and I am also a coveter.   I not only set myself up as God, I want other things more than I want God, too."    "What's that, you say?  You are looking for the closest exit?"

Truth:  A favorite quote from the sermon on the 8th Commandment, You shall not steal:  "You become like your offering.  The treasure you seek becomes the master you serve."  Here is what I wrote in my journal the next morning:  

• If I treasure my family's happiness above God, my family's happiness (or lack thereof) will master me.
• If I treasure my own comfort, then I will be a slave to pursuing what feels good.
• If I treasure Christ - living to make much of God - Jesus will remain rightly as my Lord and Master, and "all these things will be added to me as well"  ("these" meaning the kingdom of God and his righteousness, not my family's happiness and my comfort!).

Last summer I was working a lot on my landscaping- a good thing!  I love gardening and landscaping; it can be such a stress-reliever for me.  Outside, alone, praying about and processing life.  However, I had a distinct thought toward the end of the season.  Having devoted an inordinate amount of time, I said to myself, "This has mastered me!"  No triumph; little satisfaction.  Much regret.  This summer, my yard is a mess of weeds, my garden was laughable. The love of tennis threatened to master me, save that my tennis partners are not always available; alas, I have not been mastered.  A few close calls....

Dare:  "You become like your offering.  The treasure you seek becomes the master you serve."  What "treasure" is threatening to become your master?  

• Do you treasure nutrition for your family?
• Do you treasure education for your family?
• Do you treasure manis & pedis and highlights and lowlights..er...for your family? 
• Do you treasure social media to promote your family?
• Do you treasure cultural enrichment for your family?
• Do you treasure your well-appointed, crazy-high mortgaged home for your family?

You get the idea!  Consider what threatens to master you.  Often, where our thoughts go the fastest is the path to follow to find our true master.

Truth:  When we treasure Christ, we see what a gracious, giving, joyful master He is.  How do you know when He is your Master?  Here is a glimpse: When, after catching a child doing wrong and I harshly appoint consequences, Christ has not been my Master.  When the Holy Spirit nudges me to speak or act in a way out of character for me that blesses another, Christ has been my Master.  

Treasuring Christ is not a one-time, forever declaration.  Treasuring Christ is a moment-by-moment surrender to the Holy Spirit of God within- acting in obedience.  Treasuring Christ is devoting your time to getting to know the God who intimately knows you; devoting your talents to serving the God who has served you.

Dare:  Take some time to prayerfully ask yourself this question at the end of the day for the next several days:   

What did I treasure today?  (Where did I invest my thoughts, efforts, money, affection?) 
Could I stand before Christ and say, "You are my treasure!"?

And when you fail (because you will), will you preach the gospel to yourself? 
All my efforts could never be sufficient to treasure Christ in the manner He is due.  But grace abounds!  Jesus perfectly fulfilled the 10 Commandments because I never could.  Today, I confess to you Lord that I treasured _______________________ above Christ.  Forgive me! Thank you that you clean me up to present me blameless before our Father.  Thank you for treasuring me so much that you sent Christ for me.

For your glory!  
Amen.

 







 
 

S T R E T C H E D

Do you remember that time in the Bible when Jesus asks Peter, "Do you love me?"  Peter answers with, "Lord, you know I love you!"  Can we add a question mark to the end of his statement, because I imagine Peter offered it more like an indignant question than a declaration!  Befuddled Peter gets exhorted to simply "Feed my sheep."  Gulp.  What?  Take a deep breath!

Today, I sense Jesus asking me, "Do you trust me?"  The Peter-esk answer is, "Lord, you know I trust you."  Peter seemed surprised by Jesus' question.  You KNOW I love you!  My reaction is not one of surprise - more like leeriness or feeling guarded.  If pressed, my honest answer often includes caveats and conditions.  "Well, [pause] I'll definitely trust you in this circumstance, if you first provide in that way."  Or, "I can trust you this hour, but next hour I will probably not."  I am resigned to confess, "No, I don't trust you enough."

Trusting with conditions or not trusting fully may be like showering with your clothes on!  It doesn't work that way.  Or maybe it must and we will, in our human weakness, trust imperfectly all the days of our lives till we have crossed into eternity.  I don't know.  But I do know that I am being called to trust God with more, and to a greater degree. It feels like I am being stretched like a rubber band.  And when rubber bands are stretched without being handled with care, they fling in crazy ways!  But I have seen my God handle me with care.  God is my provider and this is a truth that has comforted and given courage.  Being stretched but faithless will find me brittle or broken. Being stretched while seeking to rest in my God - this is fertile ground for growth.  God's goodness does not hinge on my trust.

Take a deep breath!  "Oh for grace to trust Him more."

These Two, Powerful Words...

Yesterday, I found myself struggling to forgive an offense.  The size and type of offense are not what matters.  The old pattern of dealing with it - now that matters.  How I deal with an offense has the power to change the course of my hour, my day, my week.  (Such an understatement!)

Rewind to this winter:  I studied the book of Ephesians in the New Testament with a group of women each Friday.  The author is big on repeating sentence structures and concepts that build upon one another.  In chapter two, the Apostle Paul starts with bad news- hard truth.  Think death, disobedience, and wrath!  Two powerful words change the trajectory, though; one powerful, little conjunction:  "But God...."  The reader's attention is abruptly turned to good news and astounding truth of mercy, love, and life.  

Paul continues this same structure of bad news/good news in the next section, this time with Christ as the subject:  "But now in Christ..."  And then believers in Jesus become the subject the next time with, "but you...."  Yet further into the book we read, "but grace..."
Studying this book captivated my heart and mind like a roller coaster does my body!  I've been drawn to this crazy coaster that scares me to death; the lap bar holds me captive (I change my mind with every click-click-click), but exhilaration follows.  I need Scripture to captivate my mind, because my emotions are not unlike a roller coaster. Rides given daily, my friends!

What does this have to do with struggling to forgive an offense?  So, I find myself offended, and then seeking to understand (in my own mind, from my own "wisdom") why the other person acted in that manner.  This tends to be my go-to method, my pattern of beginning to deal!  But God.  What!?  But God.  It is the strangest thing- a thought not from my mind, but His.  A still, small voice quieted me with those two, powerful words.

God by his Spirit took me back to what had captivated me in Ephesians.  Bad news, hard truth does not stand alone!  It serves a purpose.  I serve a God who came near.  And He did not merely come, but He came to set captives free.  He came to take the old and make it new.  He came to suffer the worst kind of offense.  He came in power, and through Christ, that power is working in me.  Do you see that pattern?  Bad news - hard truth that shines a light on the good news of astounding Truth!  "But God" is whispered to my heart.  This conjunction joins the truth of the offense with the truth of God's solution- Himself.  "But God, being rich in mercy...."  This reminder quieted my thoughts of the offense.  It placed my focus on the One who can make things right.  It contrasted my sinfulness with God's holiness.  The offense lost some of its sting.  Could this be the new pattern God uses to help me deal with offenses?  Repeating truth and allowing the Holy Spirit to build concepts of truth so that a new structure is in place, one more fitting for a holy temple?  

But God.  How much would change in my life if the Good News was always applied to my bad news?  How much would change in yours?

"But grace was given to each one of us according to the measure of Christ's gift..."  (Ephesians 4:7).  

Are You a Jonah?

Now, before you answer that question, I think you will need to spit out that mouthful of seawater you just swallowed.  Okay, good.  Now we can have a conversation!

So again, "Are you a Jonah?"  I am.  Like Jonah, God calls me his own.  Like Jonah, God has given me sending orders.  Like Jonah, my first response is typically "No."  More accurately, "WHAT?  Are you crazy?  Reach out to that person?  Say yes to that task?"  [Insert Road Runner noise, speeding in the opposite direction.  But no, I've never been to Tarshish.]

We are going to delve into the life and book of Jonah at Christ Community, both in VBS and weekend sermons.  Looking at this account with fresh perspective is good for the soul!  We will be reminded of God's unfathomable character - his sense of justice; His extension of grace; might I add God's sense of humor?

We will be forced to reckon with our sin nature - our natural tendencies to run, to reject, to accuse.  Listening to these lyrics this week reminded me of Jonah:
"I am a sinner
If it's not one thing it's another
Caught up in words
Tangled in lies
But you are a Savior
And you take brokenness aside
And make it beautiful
Beautiful"

These lyrics remind me of me, too.  What about you?  Are you a Jonah?  We need to be confronted with our sin.  We will be reminded of the Truth that sets us free.

Take a listen.  See you this weekend!

Fall in Love....Read.

Books

I love books.

I love books in the sun.

I love books on the run.

I love books at my school.

I love books by my pool.

On a picnic blanket, laying in the grass.

On a bouncy trampoline, stopping to rest, at last.

How do you love your books?

  

Are you familiar with the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics?  I have no clue what the first law is (some of you are mentally informing me as you read).  But I do know the 2nd law, and this premise just really lights my fire, in a good way!  I love it because it makes sense of the disorder of life.  The 2nd Law of Thermodynamics - in my words - states that anything left to itself tends toward a state of disorder.  This is encouraging and instructive.  Why, you ask?  Because it explains why my home and car tend toward states of disorder.  Why my brain does.  Why my heart does!  This encourages me because it is normal- expected, even.

This 2nd Law of Thermodynamics is instructive, too.  It teaches me to prepare for the disorder and plan accordingly.  So, my son cleans my ultra-cool minivan each Saturday.  My daughter runs the vacuum.  (Teaching life skills and conquering disorder!)

What do books and the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics have in common?  Well, in our house, we like to read.  We also like a bit of laziness.  So you put the two together and we end of reading anything and everything that crosses our path; this does not amount to quality literature ("Trending on Facebook" sidebar is so tempting!)  Our intentions to read great books start strong...... but start to slide.  

If this sounds like you, have no fear!  A quality summer reading list is here.

On the opposite spectrum and rarely read?  Take heart!  An engaging list is here.

The following links contain great books with which you just may fall in love.

http://www.thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/justintaylor/2014/03/04/a-complete-classical-christian-school-reading-list-grades-1-8/

http://www.sonlight.com/search.html?search=summer%20reading

Register for VBS!

How to Register For VBS at Christ Community Church 
& What is Required for Serving in VBS:

1) Registration:  http://goo.gl/forms/M8JFkPtDsm

(Necessary for every child entering 5th grade or younger, even those needing childcare.)

2) Medical Release:    http://goo.gl/forms/qijFRXChkn

(Necessary for every child and teen at VBS.)

              All Youth Who Desire to Serve in VBS:

                   *Mandatory VBS Training Time 

           on Saturday, June 6th - 10 am til noon

                           Snacks Provided!

                   Meet your leader and team

This meeting is also for adults who will serve as area leaders,                 Art Track and Sports Track, and as small group leaders.

                

*If you are unable to attend, you must come to the make-up 

meeting on Sunday, June 14th at 9 am  til 10:15am.
**Failure to attend one of these meetings (for youth) will result in not serving in VBS.  

 Led by Sara Nist and Mike Veitz.